Sick of the Negativity

This is a post that's been meaning to be put up for a long time but going home for the holidays motivated me to do it as soon as I got internet back.

I got married at 17. It may have not been the best choice but it's what was right for us at the time. I had our son going into my senior year. Married with a child, separated from my husband, and going to school: What the heck just happened? We literally got married the day I got out of the hospital (I had to go back 3 days later because I got a blood infection).


Here I am a new mom, newlywed and in high school. The plan was finish school early and join him. This was the easy part. The hard part of actually moving to a new state, becoming a wife and maintaining a household is what scared me to death. Who in their right mind thinks they'd be doing that a week after finishing school? It's not the fact that I had to do it but that I had to adjust to doing this at 18 years old. I don't care if you think this is shocking or not but it is to me. What were you doing at 18? Exactly. Absolutely no one gave me the benefit of the doubt. Nobody thought I could do this, and to be honest I didn't think I could either. Everyone thought I just sat at home and mooched off my husband. But these comments came from people who had no idea what being a mom or wife was like.

What pisses me off the most is that they expected me to just move away and know exactly what I want to do with my life. That wasn't the case at all! I sat there day after day staring at the clock, watching the chores pile up and making sure my son was taken care of. Honestly at that point he was all that mattered.  My husband is not a communicator at all. He can go a whole day without talking if he didn't have to. That made it hard for me to let him know how lost and scared I was.

I guess what I am trying to say is it's annoying to know that people think I do nothing with my life. After all the unnecessary input started flowing in I got my shit together and learned how to run a household, take care of the finances, and got back into school. I could've taken the lazy road and did nothing but I needed to find out my purpose. I think by getting all that negative feedback I understood what I needed to do. My husband needed me to be his partner and do what he wasn't able to. I am so proud of myself because I know for damn sure none of the people I am friends with, or even my family, could not do what I do every day. I may not work but I contribute to my family in ways that my husband can't. I bring something different to the table that my family function without.

So to all the spouses that are able to work and to those who are stay at home mom's, you are a phenomenal person and I wish you the best of luck with everything. I hope no one ever makes you feel the way I did.




P.S. Elias is 19 months today!! His vocabulary is slowly increasing and he loves to help us out. Tomorrow is an all day potty training session since I cleaned the house spotless all weekend and I won't have too much to do this week. Wish me luck!